The Wordsmythe's Weblog…

…On Words, Love and Life

Archive for the month “September, 2012”

Book cover

I got the art proof for my book cover a couple of days ago and I was absolutely delighted. I think it captures the tone of the book really well. The publication date is the 8th of March 2013.

What do you think?

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Letter to Eyebrow Threader

Dear Eyebrow threader,

It is with a heavy heart that I write you this letter. You see, I’m very upset by the state of my eyebrows since I visited your beauty shop.

I am naturally endowed with rather bushy eyebrows as you may have noticed. It runs in the family. WEO and EDU are similarly endowed. As a matter of fact, until quite recently, EDU’s were so thick that they formed a uni-brow, you couldn’t tell where one stopped and the other began.

You may not know this but I prefer to have them threaded rather than waxed or tweezed. As painful as they all are, I find threading the quickest and most efficient as opposed to the long drawn out torture of the other methods. It is for this reason that I came to you. That, and your reduced rates as advertised on the hand-painted sign board just outside your shop.

Perhaps the spelling, or shall I say mis-spelling on the board should have served as an omen of things to come. However, I didn’t want to be pedantic so I dismissed it as the work of a non-English speaker. Spelling ‘eye brows’ as ‘eye bros’, ‘upper lip’ as ‘opa leap’ and ‘manicure and pedicure’ as ‘manikyor and pedikyor’ is fairly easy for someone who doesn’t speak English well.

When I came to get my eyebrows tamed and teased into shape, I asked you to keep the thickness but shape them nicely and maintain their natural arc. You didn’t even let me finish before you cut in, a tad indignant, “I do it ‘tick’, yes, ‘tick.’”

So you can imagine my shock and horror when I looked in the mirror after you’d finished to find my luscious eyebrow locks almost completely shorn. All that was left in their place was a thin strip of hair. I tell you, I would have had more hair there if I had alopecia!

I didn’t need to come to you if this was what I wanted. If I’d wanted to replicate the look sported by Eucharia Anunobi of Nollywood fame now turned Evangelist, I would have armed myself with a shaving stick then let WEO and EDU loose on my face with an eyebrow pencil. They would probably have done a better job.

I’m not pleased in the least. I know you apologised and explained that you got a bit carried away but how does that help me in any way

Now I have to walk around with semi-nude brows until the hairs grow out, God alone knows how long that will take. It would be in my best interest, and yours, if I didn’t darken your doorstep again. I would much rather look like a Sasquatch than have you or your weapon of mass destruction, the thread, come within a mile of my face. I may not be responsible for what I would to do to you should this indignity reoccur.

I can only pray that no other customer suffers a similar indignity at your hands.

Farewell and good riddance,

The Wordsmythe.

Not Self-updating!

I have just logged on to my blog, and knock me over with a feather, the last post was on the 4th of September! What! To say that I’m shocked doesn’t even come close to describing how I feel 😦

It is apparent that the blog didn’t get the memo to self-update, with no input from me, its owner.

I could have sworn that I left specific instructions for this blog to deliver regular updates. I can’t believe that my instructions were not followed to a ‘t’. Sigh! You just can’t get the help these days.

Seeing as I have to do everything around here myself, I am working on a proper post and will upload it shortly, promise.

In the words of Arnold Schwarzenegger aka the Terminator, “I’ll be back.”

Tara for now.

A new era

It’s the end of an era and the beginning of a new one. School resumed today for the kids. Well, it resumed for WEO who’s in Year 2 now. His brother attended ‘big’ school for the first time.

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I say the end of an era because both boys have moved on from nursery school. So it’s the start of a new one with both of them now at primary school.

Seeing EDU dressed in his uniform this morning sent me looking through photographs of years gone by. As I went through the pictures, dormant memories of nappy-changing, sleepless nights and zombie-like days, crying babies and a host of others were brought to the fore.

I’m thankful that we got through all those days (and nights) in one piece. I’m thankful for the boys’ development and progress and I’m looking forward to the challenges and triumphs of this new era.

Life is constantly on the move, even when we think things aren’t moving, they are. Seasons come and seasons go. Summer, here in the UK, passed in a hodgepodge of heavy, flood-inducing downpours and glorious sunshine in a way that is quintessentially British.

Autumn will be upon us in a few weeks. The luscious green foliage will metamorphose into golden yellow, burgundy red and burnt orange. Redundant leaves, having outlasted their usefulness, will be evicted from deciduous trees. The landscape will be dotted with the gnarling, naked branches of oaks and birch. A few evergreens will remind us of what once was and what will be again.

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Soon dusk will make an early appearance, putting an end to the long bright days of summer and ushering in the cold winter chill. Once winter arrives, our thoughts will turn to Christmas, the end of the year and the beginning of a new one. And the cycle of life will continue.

Anyway, now the kids are back to school, I need to focus on my writing a lot more. I hope to be a lot more productive than I have been in the last six weeks.

Enjoy the last few weeks of summer and thanks for stopping by.

Second photo courtesy Wikipedia

 

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